Q: What are the grounds for divorce in Oklahoma?

A: Although there are 12 grounds for divorce in Oklahoma, only one is commonly used.  It is incompatibility.

Q: What is the first step in the divorce process?

A: Filing a petition. The first step in the divorce process is filing a petition.  Even where both spouses agree that they want to get divorced

Q: What are the grounds for divorce in Oklahoma?

A: Although there are 12 grounds for divorce in Oklahoma, only one is commonly used.  It is incompatibility.

Q: What is the first step in the divorce process?

A: Filing a petition. The first step in the divorce process is filing a petition.  Even where both spouses agree that they want to get divorced, one of them will have to be the one to file a petition with the court asking for the divorce.  The petition will sate grounds for the divorce.

Q: What power does the divorce court have after the case is started?

A: The divorce court, upon application and hearing, will issue a temporary order concerning possession of property, custody and visitation of children and payments of any expenses connected with the case under which the parties will operate until the conclusion of the caw.  The court will. At the time of trial or settlement, equitably, and fairly divide the marital property and debts; address child custody/visitation and child support, and grant the divorce; it may, if appropriate, award support alimony and attorney fee, and costs, but not always. 

Q: What happens after my petition has been filed?

A: At the time your petition is filed, a summons is issued by the Court Clerk notifying your spouse that the divorce has been filed.  At the same time, your attorney can make application for a temporary order to be issued which would direct your spouse to take specific actions or restrain the spouse from certain things.  You will be required to appear in court to testify as to your need for each of the temporary request you are making.  Unless your souse signs a waiver, or is missing and service by publication is proper, your divorce papers will be turned over to a Deputy of the Sheriff’s Office or a special officer appointed by the court to serve the papers.  Often, the attorney does not know when the papers have been served but will his or her best efforts to find out and notify you.  After the papers have been served, the spouse has 20 days in which to file an answer, normally through a lawyer, in court. 

Q: What is a Temporary Order?

A: If one spouse depends on the order for financial support or will have custody of the children, that spouse needs to ask the court for temporary orders for support and custody.  For example, is a stay at home mom files for divorce, she will need financial support from her husband to continue paying the household bills.  She will also need a temporary custody order and a temporary child support order for the kids.  A temporary order is usually granted within a few weeks and will remain in effect until a full court hearing.  If the party seeking the temporary order is the same party who files the petition, they should file them at the same time.  If the party seeking the temporary order did not file the petition, they should file them at the same time.  If the party seeking the temporary order did not file the petition, they should file their request for the temporary order as soon as possible. 

Q: What about service of process?

A: The party who file for divorce also needs to file proof of service of process.  This is a document that shows that a copy of the divorce petition was given to the other party.  Service of process can be either very dignified or very undignified or anywhere in between.  If the parties mutually agree on the divorce, it is best for the party who files the complaint to arrange for service of process to the other party’s attorney.  Having a process server visit one’s spouse at his or her place of employment to serve papers falls into the undignified category. 

Q:  When can a temporary order be granted?

A: The court cannot grant a temporary order for custody, child support, possession of property, alimony, or exclusion from your home until your spouse has been served with notice of a hearing at least five days prior to a hearing on your request.  You may obtain an emergency order of custody and other matter without notice to you spouse if irreparable harm will occur by filing an application.  However, a hearing must be set within 10 days of this emergency order and notice of that hearing must be given to your spouse. 

Q: What happens after the service of process?

A: The party who receives service of process will then need to file a response to the petition.  If a divorce was sought on fault grounds and the responding party wants to dispute those grounds, he or she will need to address it in the response.  The responding party may choose to dispute the facts that are alleged to be the grounds for divorce or he or she may choose to assert a defense to the grounds.  If there is a disagreement as to property division, support, custody, or any other issue, this should be set out in the response.

Q: What if my spouse violates the terms of the temporary order or divorce decree?

A: Three remedies are available to you should your spouse violate any of the provision of the temporary order or divorce decree.  First, your spouse may be cited doe contempt of court and if found guilty, be placed in jail or fined, or both.  Second, if the violation consists of a failure to pay money, such as for support, you may garnish paychecks and bank accounts and execute on personal property.  You may also obtain an Order of Income Assignment, which directs your spouse’s employer to send the child support directly to you.  Third, if the violation consists of a failure to pay child support for one (1) year or the amount owed exceeds five thousand dollars ($5,000.00) or your spouse has moved to another state, criminal charges may be filed with the District Attorney’s office.  You can expect to testify that child support is not being paid. 

If the violation consists of breaking the law, such as breaking and entering or assault and battery, the police should immediately be notified and criminal charges filed by you.  Many emergency situations, pending the divorce, can be handled merely by calling the police.  In addition a souse may file a Victim’s Protection Order if he or she and /or children have been a victim of domestic abuse, stalking or harassment by the other spouse by filing a Petition for Protective Order in the County in which the victim (s) reside, or the County in which the abuse occurred.

Q: How does long divorce take?

A: If both parties are in agreement to the divorce there are no children, a divorce may be granted 10 days after the filing of the petition.  It is necessary for your spouse to execute a waiver, which will include a waiver or process.

            In a divorce where there are minor children involved, there is a 90 day waiting period from the date of service of the summons, the first date of publication or an entry of appearance by the defendants, whichever occurs first.

            The 90-day waiting period may be waived under certain circumstances.  If your spouse hires an attorney and contests the action, the case will take much linger that 90 days – up to 18 months.

Q: What happens if my spouse and I can’t agree?

A: If the parties don’t agree on all the issues, they will need to try to negotiate their differences.  The court may schedule settlement conferences that attempt t move the parties toward a final resolution of the issue.  If the parties disagree on child custody and visitation, the court may also order mediation, evaluation of the children and parents by a social worker or other court employee and that a lawyer or guardian ad litem be appointed to represent the children.  Other issues that may need to be negotiated are the property division and any spousal support.

Q: If my case is settled, do both my spouse and I have to go to court.

A: No. Only one of the parties must go to court and give brief sworn testimony.  Normally, an advance copy of the divorce decree will have been provided to your spouse and a signature obtained approving the decree.

Q: If my case goes to trial, is it before a jury?

A: No. In Oklahoma, all divorce case are tried before a judge only.  However, an action for contempt filed in a divorce proceeding may be tries to a jury. Any issues the parties absolutely cannot resolve between themselves will have to be decided at a trial.  However, going to trial will take longer, cost more money, and have less predictable results so it is probably best to avoid going to trial if possible.

Q: For the benefit of the children can court make orders regarding the parents’ moral conduct?

A: Following are some guideline concerning children of separated parents; called the “Ten Commandments” of Proper Conduct for Separated Parents.”

            As you know, your children are usually the losers when their parents separate.  They are deprived of the full time, proper, guidance that two parents can give-guidance and direction essential to their moral and spiritual growth.

            Although there is probably some bitterness between you and your spouse, it should not be inflicted upon your children.  In every child’s mind, there must and should be an image of TWO good parents.  Your future conduct with your children will be helpful if you will follow these suggestions:

1)     Do not poison your child’s mind against either their mother or father by discussing their shortcomings.

2)     Do not expose your children to any member of the opposite sex with whom you may be emotionally involved.

3)     Do not argue with the other parent during visitation exchanges.

4)     Do not visit your children if you have been drinking.

5)     Do not visit your children at unreasonable hours.

6)     Do not fail to notify your spouse as soon as possible if you are unable to keep your visitation.  It’s unfair to your children to keep them waiting – and worse to disappoint them by not coming at all.

7)     Make your visitation as pleasant as possible for your children by NOT questioning them regarding the activities of your spouse and by NOT making extravagant promises, which you know you cannot or will not keep.

8)     The parent with whom the children live must prepare them both physically and mentally for the visitation.  The children should be available at the time mutually agreed upon.

9)     If one parent has plans for the children that conflict with the visitation and these plans are in the best interest of the children, be adults and work out the problems together.

10)  Always work for the spiritual well-being, heath, happiness and safety of your children.

Q: What visitation does the court generally award to the alternative custodial parent?

A: Contact the divorce judge’s office in the country you will be filing in to get a current copy of a standard visitation schedule because counties have different schedules.

            While there is no fixed visitation schedule required by law, an example of a fairly common visitation schedule is as follows:

                                       I.      Holiday Visitation

Spring Break

            Even Years: Custodial Parent

            Odd Years:     Non- Custodial Parent

                                    Fall Break

                                                Even Years: Non-Custodial Parent

                                                Odd Years: Custodial Parent

                                    Thanksgiving Break

                                                Even Years: Custodial Parent

                                                Odd Years: Non-Custodial Parent

                                    First week Christmas Break

                                                Even Years: Non-Custodial Parent

                                                Odd Years: Custodial Parent

                                    Balance of Christmas Week

                                                Even Years: Custodial Parent

                                                Odd Years: Non-Custodial Parent

                                    All Mother’s Day weekends shall be spent with the mother.

                                    All Father’s Day weekends shall be spent with the father.

                                    THE HOLIDAY SCHEDULE SUPERSEDES ALL REGULARLY SCHEDULED VISITATION.  The Holiday Schedule shall be governed by the school the child attends or would attend if not of school age.

                                     II.      Summer Visitation

The non-custodial parent shall have summer visitation for two weeks in June and must notify the custodial parent of the dates by May 30.

The non-custodial parent shall have summer visitation for two weeks in July and must notify the custodial parent of the dates by May 30.

The non-custodial parent shall have summer visitation the first full week of August.

All toys and clothes belong to the child(ren) and should travel freely between households and shall be returned with the child(ren) in a clean and orderly manner.

It is important to be aware that this visitation scheduled is for the purpose of providing assured minimum amounts of visitation between non-custodial parent and child(ren).  Visitation should exceed the number of occasions set out herein.  In addition, liberal telephone communications between non-custodial parent and child(ren) are encouraged and shall occur.

Q: What is a no-fault divorce?

A: In our state, the traditional grounds of abandonment, martial misconduct and irreconcilable differences no longer need to be claimed by either spouse in order to obtain a divorce.  In Oklahoma the only grounds for a divorce is “that the marriage is irretrievably broken with no reasonable prospect of reconciliation.”  If either spouse wishes to attempt reconciliation, they must request that both husband and wife attend a counseling session through the Court’s conciliation services offering free counseling services through qualified marriage counselor.  If counseling is successful, and the parties reconcile, then the divorce will be dismissed by the Court.  However, if, after the counseling sessions, it is determined that the parties’ marriage is irrtrievably7 broken and that there is no reasonable prospects of reconciliation, the Court will order that the dissolution be continued until a final Decree of Dissolution is signed the a Judge of the Arizona Superior Court.   

Q: What is an uncontested divorce?

A: If both husband and wife completely agree on the division of the assets and debts accumulated during the marriage and are in agreement concerning the issues of child custody, visitation, support and alimony, then the divorce may be considered “uncontested” since there are no areas of dispute.  However, if the parties only agree that they can no longer remain married, it does not mean that the divorce is uncontested, since the parties also agree on division of the community assets and liabilities, and the custody and support issues concerning any minor children.

Q: What is community property?

A: Oklahoma considers income earned and property and debts acquired during a marriage to be community property regardless of which spouse acquires the asset or incur the debt.  Even if one spouse accounts for the couple’s entire income, or incurs a debt in his or her name, both will generally and will also share the income and property equally and will also share the responsibility for the debts.

Q: What is separate property?

A: Property owned by each spouse prior to the marriage is separate property.  Additionally, property acquired during the marriage by gift to one spouse or by inheritance by one spouse is also separate property.  It is possible, however, to co-mingle or combine one’s separate property with the marriage property to such an extent that the separate property loses its identity and merges into the martial property.  It is important to consult with an attorney to ensure that separate property obtained during the marriage retains its separate identity rather than becoming part of the community property estates.

Q: What types of custody are acceptable to the court?

A: The court may award either sole custody to one parent, with reasonable visitation to the non-custodial parent, or, in the alternative, the court may award shared custody with one parent being designed as the primary residential parent.

Q: What factors are considered by the Court in granting shared custody?

A: The court considers a number of factors, including the following, in determining whether a shared custody agreement will be approved.

a. Whether both parents are fit and proper persons to exercise the care, custody and control of the minor child.

            b. That both parent desire to have an ongoing relationship with their child.

            c. That both parents are able to carry out the child’s shared custody plan.

d. That it is in the child’s best interest for each parent to have frequent, meaningful and continuing access to the child.

Q: What factors should be considered by the parents in deciding whether or not there should be shared custody?

A: Some of the factors include:

            a. The geographic location of the parents.

            b. Each parent’s ability to care for the child and provide for the child’s needs.

            c. Lack of hostility between the parents.

            d. Whether both parent’s work schedule and the child’s schedule will accommodate shared custody.

            e. Whether the parents can agree upon scheduled holiday and vacation visitation time periods.

            f. Whether there has been regular and consistent contact with child by both parents before and during the divorce proceedings.

If these basic factors are not present, then the concept of shared custody most likely will not be in the best interest of the child and instead, one parent should be the sole custodial parent with the other parent being granted reasonable visitation.

Q: What are the guidelines for reasonable visitation for the non-custodial parent and guidelines for child support?

A: Guidelines have been established to determine the amount of child support to be paid by the non-custodial parent.  It id difficult the determine the amount of child support without the guidance of an attorney since the formula used by the court is complex and includes factors such as expenses of childcare, health insurance, visitation, supporting other children outside of the marriage, and those expenses necessary for the special needs of a child.

Q: Once ordered, can custody and support be changed?

A: Both custody and support can always be modified by the Court since it retains continuing jurisdiction until the child reaches the age of majority.  However, a parent seeking modification must show, at a minimum, that there has been a continuing and significant change in circumstances justifies a modification of the child support amount or that a change of the custody arrangement would be in the best interest of the child.

Q: Is it necessary to involve an attorney to obtain a divorce?

A: It is important to understand your rights and obligations in a divorce proceeding prior to beginning the process.  There are many rumors and untruths circulating concerning divorce, custody and support.  It is wise to understand how the laws apply to your specific situation. Divorce can be stressful and difficult time in one’s life.  The guidance and advice of an experienced and knowledgeable attorney familiar with the complexity of court proceedings and with your legal rights and obligations will be of great comfort and benefit to you. 

Q: What does the Decree of Divorce contain?

A: The order of dissolution ends the marriage and spells out how the property and debts are to be divided, custody, support, and any other issues.  When the parties negotiate their own resolution to all of the issues, they will draft the order dissolution and submit it to the court.  If the order of dissolution complies with legal requirements and both parties entered into it knowingly and willingly, then the judge will approve it.  Otherwise the court will issue an Order of Dissolution at the end of the trial.

Q: When is my divorce final?

A: it is final the day you go to court and the divorce is granted.  You are a single person once the judge pronounces you divorced.  However, Oklahoma law prohibits remarriage or cohabitation with a third party for six months following the decree.  Should you and your spouse decide to reconcile during this period, a joint application can be filed in the court and the decree will be set aside, so long as neither party has remarried a third party during the interim.